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[SevenEleven]

Lost a Bird
a priest lost a bird & asked during mass...
Priest: anyone got a bird?
all men stood up.
Priest: i mean, any1 seen a bird?
all women stood up.
Priest: i meant any1 seen my bird?
...all nuns stood up

Dalawang Sira ulo....
Sira1: Magaling ka na ba?
Sira2: Oo namn!!!
Sira1: Talaga?...kaya mo bng 2mawid sa ilaw ng flashlight ko?
Sira2: Ano ko cra? e pano kung patayin mo flashlyt mo?...e d nalaglag pa ko!!!

TEACHER and BOY
TEACHER: Anong mangyayari pag puputulin ang 1 mong tenga?
BOY: hihina po pandinig ko.
TEACHER: e kung dalawang tenga?
BOY: lalabo po paningin ko!
TEACHER: baket naman?
BOY: malalaglag po salamin ko.