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When the sleepwear finally comes off, what goes on? “The exterminator came and I put on a shirt. It was very exciting,” , a science-comedy writer in New York, said. Otherwise, the answer tends to be sweatpants—also, for some reason, called joggers, if they’re tapered at the ankle. These baggy bottoms, which Karl Lagerfeld called “a sign of defeat,” seem to be outselling jeans, which are considered unnecessarily restrictive and rather hoity-toity for these times. As a Twitterer put it in March, “People who are quarantining in jeans: what are you trying to prove?” If you want to look as though you’re wearing sweats on purpose and not because you’ve thrown in the towel, go unduly big and pair them with a tank top. Joah Brown’s Oversized or Empire sweatpants send that message ($128-$138). For an “all dressed up and nowhere to go but the living room” look, Club Monaco has a narrow-legged satin tuxedo-striped number with matching sweatshirt ($129). The creamy-soft moisture-wicking “performance joggers” sold at Vuori have pockets for your phone and come highly recommended, even if performance for you means solving the crossword puzzle ($84). The belted cargo-style version from Cotton Citizen is flattering enough to transcend the label of sweatpants, and the many tie-dyed options would have thrilled Ken Kesey ($355; tie-dyed, $225). Men: the Ace sweats from Mack Weldon have zippered pockets, a tailored silhouette, and ribbed cuffs, and are made of French terry with just the slightest amount of stretch. They come in thirteen colors (why?), and you could wear them outside (remember outside?) ($78). Uniqlo’s sweatpants (for men, women, and kids) are the Honda Civic of athleisure: simple, sporty, durable, and cheap. Plus, they have pockets and no logos. I have a pair in navy that have not pilled or become sad-shaped despite being nearly as old as the original gray knit workout attire, created in the nineteen-twenties by a French clothing merchant named Émile Camuset ($15-$30).
